Author's Note: This is a figurative language piece and I want the reader to be able to picture Kate Fitzgerald walking into the room.
Kate Fitzgerald walks into the cafeteria for the first time. Her bald head shines as bright as the sun and her legs are as thin as a twig. Her perfect scent of flowers and raspberries smells like she is walking through a garden of roses.
Her legs shake like bare branches on tress; You can tell she is scared. She is scared of what might happen or what if something happens. The way her left leg points in like a pigeon tells you how shy and unsure she is. Even though she is shy smiles cover the room when her manners and pleasant personality come out of her and to everyone in the cafeteria.
"Her bald head shines" and "her hair covers her face" those two sentences contradict themselves. Other than that, nice description.
ReplyDeleteI think that you had goo descriptions of this character Jennie!!1
ReplyDeleteYou gave a very good description of Kate, and it gave me a really good visual of what she would look like.
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